Good Versus Evil and Science Against Magic

It is a great animated movie. Ask those in my generation and others who have watched it, and you will see their eyes gleaming, and they will suddenly talk about the artwork, parts of the story and the dialogue even. The Flight of Dragons is about a quest to save man from evil's conquest of the realm of magic and the realm of science. Seeing the need to separate the two worlds, Carolinus, the green wizard of nature, recommends his plan to his brothers Solarius, blue wizard of space and sea, Lo Tae Shao, gold wizard of the air and solemnity and Ommadon, red wizard of evil and dark magic. Being the embodiment of evil and greed, Ommadon does not agree to the plan and intends to use magic to inspire man to use science to make creations that will inevitably lead to his destruction. To stop Ommadon, one has to capture his red crown, the source of all his power.

With the quest and eventual battle being staged on land, the territory of Carolinus, the green wizard chooses his dragon Gorbash and friend Sir Orin Neville Smythe, a knight. For the leader and third member of the quest, Carolinus asks Antiquity for assistance to make the selection. Antiquity chooses Peter Dickinson, a 20th century man of science upon the puzzlement of Carolinus. From there, Peter is brought to the realm of magic from 20th century Boston and in an accident is merged with Gorbash before the quests even begins. Sir Orin, Gorbash/Peter and Smrgol, the dragon uncle of Gorbash proceeds to Ommadon's territory and gathers allies along the way such as Arak, canine friend of Gorbash, Danielle, a female archer and Giles of the Treetops, the elvin outlaw. Together they face dangers such as the Ogre of Gormly Keep, the giant worm that secretes highly corrosive acid and Ommadon's horde of dragons under his dark spell. Peter and Ommadon eventually battle in the end as science against magic, respectively.

Seven Reasons Why The Flight of Dragons is a Great Animated Film

In the story, Peter Dickinson is the ancestor of Great Peter, the dragon master, the one who tamed dragons and taught them how to speak. The two are separated by 777 generations. With this, I present the seven reasons why The Flight of Dragons is one of the best animated films ever.

1. It is About a Quest

Ah, yes. A quest is a buddy, road trip and David versus Goliath movie rolled into one. It brings a small band of main characters with various backgrounds together in an adventure. Along the way, they get close and face insurmountable odds. This formula has been appealing in movies whether they are animated or live-action.

2. It Has Creatures and Characters of Magic and Fantasy

Dragons, wizards, knights, archers, ogres and fairies feed the imagination of the audience. Movies take the audience away from reality to the world of fiction and even fantasy. Aside from the said traditional magical creatures and characters, The Flight of Dragons also has its unique creatures such as the giant worm and the horde of sandmerks. Forgive me for the spelling if it is wrong, but there are no subtitles because the movie is not on DVD yet. Individually, they are just like rats that stand on hind legs and around two feet tall, but collectively, they can drive one mad with their mind-maddening chattering.

3. It Has Great Dialogue

“You… complete me.” “Hasta la vista baby.” “You can't handle the truth!” Great movies have great and memorable dialogue, and The Flight of Dragons has a lot of it from the humorous to the wise to the gallant such as the following.

Dialogue One: Gorbash with Carolinus at night looking over a pond of water

Gorbash (doubtful and sarcastic): “Are you certain this is a limpid pool of time?”

Carolinus: “My dear young fellow, I am one of the four magic brothers. I should know a limpid pool of time when I see one.”

Dialogue Two: Melisande with Carolinus discussing the meeting of the four magical brothers

Melisande: “But why does Antiquity force you to include something so abominable?”

Carolinus: “As evil is a part of all things, evil is a part of our world of magic. And the irony of all existence is that good would be totally impotent without the contrast of evil.”

Dialogue Three: Sir Orin standing by the bodies of his comrades with sword held by praying hands and facing Breog, the devil dragon.

Sir Orin: “Giles, my darling Danielle and Arak too!”

(calm and filled with courage): “Blade with whom I have lived,

Blade with whom I now die,

Serve right and justice one last time.” (flash of Giles' body)

“Seek one last heart of evil.” (flash of Arak's body)

“Still one last life of pain.”

“Cut well old friend… (flash of Danielle's body)

And, farewell!”

That third dialogue is actually etched inside me and has resonated in my mind since 1982. It is a knight's code of servitude and sacrifice and his last living act to rid one last creature of evil. Those who have seen The Flight of Dragons quip dialogues like these three I mentioned to one another.

4. It Has Effective Celebrity Voice-over

This is one of the movies that effectively used celebrity voice-overs in animated films before it somewhat became an industry standard after Pixar's Toy Story featuring the voices of Tom Hanks and Tim Allen. Remember that The Flight of Dragons came from 1982, and it was voiced over by actors of that time. Harry Morgan, the white-haired actor and one of the leads in the movie and TV show MASH, is the voice of Carolinus. He has a firm grandfatherly voice that is perfect for the green wizard. John Ritter, who was the lead in the hit TV sitcom Three's Company, is the voice of Peter Dickinson. John Ritter fills this character's wonder of dragons and modesty very well. Finally, when one remembers The Flight of Dragons, one remembers James Earl Jones as the voice of red wizard Ommadon. This is probably the best voice-over of his career topping Mufasa of The Lion King and tying, if not edging Darth Vader. That speech wherein he orders Breog to lead the dragon army against Peter and his comrades is brought to life with his booming and reverberating voice. It tops off with a crazed shout of, “a flight… of dragons!”, and ending with the words “doom, doom, doom”. It just grabs you and tightens your chest. Aside from being a great actor, James Earl Jones is the ultimate talent for voice-overs.

5. It is a Product of 80s Anime, Anime Taken to a Higher Level

The Flight of Dragons comes from the era after mecha ruled TV anime in the 70s. The movie is a Rankin-Bass production, but the Illustrators are Japanese. Toru Hama is the animation coordinator, and the storyboard and animation direction are by Katsuhisa Yamada and Flimihiko Takayama. Anime transcended to something intricate, elaborate and beautiful in The Flight of Dragons after the box-type cartoonish characters in the mecha anime of the 70s, which I actually like also. There is detail, for example, in Smrgol's curled horns and lips, and the film has interesting designs such as Sir Orin's long trident instead of a mere lance and Lo Tae Shao's unique serpentine dragon unlike the other blimp-like bodied dragons. The artwork here is very impressive.

6. It Has Beautiful Music

Don McLean highlights the music of The Flight of Dragons with his singing of the theme song written by Jules Bass and Maury Laws. Below are its lyrics which I got from www.lyrics007.com.

The Flight of Dragons Theme Song Lyrics

Flight of dragons soar in the purple light

In the sky or in my mind

Flight of dragons sail past reality

Leave illusion behind

Is it the past I see

When I look up to the heavens

Believing in the magic

That I know could never be

I want to go where they are going

Into the world they've been

Can I open up my mind enough to see

Flight of dragons, heavenly argosies

Catch the wind, rise out of sight

Flight of dragons, pilots of fantasy

In the sky or in my mind

Flight of dragons

Flight of dragons

Don McLean is the singer of the classic songs Vincent and American Pie, and the Flight of Dragons song and music in the movie has a dreamy quality to it.

7. It has a Unique Element: Giving Scientific Explanations to Magic and Creatures of Fantasy

Finally, what makes The Flight of Dragons unique is the presence of scientific explanations in a fantasy movie. This is embodied in the scene where Gorbash/Peter explains how dragons fly with the assistance of Smrgol. It turns out that dragons are like blimps or hot-air balloons lifted by hydrogen derived from the mix of stomach acids and calcium. Dragons get the calcium from the limestone that they regularly eat. An electrical spark in the roof of the dragon's mouth ignites the hydrogen, and being lighter than air, lifts the dragon to flight. The dragon propels himself with his wings and blows out hydrogen in the form of flame or “dragon fire” in order to descend. It's a pretty crafty explanation and catchy story element mixing science into magic.

The Flight of Dragons Live-Action Movie

From an animated film, The Flight of Dragons can be elevated into a great live-action film. We're now in the age of CGI in cinema where in this age, The Lord of the Rings trilogy was made into Oscar-winning movies, Harry Potter was successfully brought out from book to film and various superheroes fly about, stretch and swing from building to building. After the Lord of the Rings, The Chronicles of Narnia came out and there are even plans to make The Hobbit into a live action movie. The fantasy genre is still alive and kicking the box office, and The Flight of Dragons can be a blockbuster.

Personally, I prefer Chris Columbus to direct The Flight of Dragons if it becomes a movie. I like that enchantment and magic of discovery present in the first Harry Potter film that he made. I also prefer Weta, the company behind the special effects of The Lord of the Rings, to participate in making the movie. To take this idea of turning The Flight of Dragons into a live-action movie further into flight, let's play casting director for a while and choose possible actors for the key characters. Below are my choices.

Casting Suggestions for a Flight of Dragons Live Action Movie

Green Wizard Carolinus - Ben Kingsley (Oscar winning actor with voice close to Harry Morgan's; put a skull cap on him, long nose and a beard and he's Carolinus!)

20th Century Man Peter Dickinson - Edward Norton, Ewan McGregor (Yep, those two can be Peter.)

Knight Sir Orin Neville Smythe - Jason Isaacs, Pierce Brosnan (Must be around his 40s or 50s, dashing and with a British accent. Wearing that armour is a plus factor for them to take on the role.)

Princess Melisande - Alexis Bledel, Anne Hathaway (Dreamy, ethereal beauties. I would love to hear more suggestions for this character)

Red Wizard Ommadon - James Earl Jones (The man voiced him; he should play him! They have the same body mass as well!)

Lady Archer Danielle -Saffron Burrows (Her age is like Danielle's, and she's fit too.)

Elvin Outlaw Giles - Billy Boyd (He was Pippen, one of the hobbits in The Lord of the Rings. Might as well be elvin outlaw Giles too!)

Blue Wizard Solarius - Laurence Fishburne, Samuel L. Jackson (great voices and toughness for the part)

Gold Wizard Lo Tae Shao - Henry O (Jet Li's mob boss father in Romeo Must Die; his facial qualities, especially the cheeks, are like Lo Tae Shao's!)

The Pawnbroker - Judd Hirsch (Jeff Goldblum's father in Independence Day can smoothly deliver those pawnbroker's lines. Somehow, he can be Carolinus too!)

Voices of

Dragon Gorbash - Billy Crystal (Must have comedic angle)

Dragon Smrgol -Robert Loggia (Must have that old, experienced, grandfatherly quality)

Devil Dragon Breog - Michael Ironside (Tough, tough, tough and intimidating. “Puny scum of Carolinus!! Prepare to die!” He can say that well.)

Canine Arak - Brian Cox (Slightly scruffy, nice old voice)

Antiquity - Alan Rickman (Yes, yes, he's just a tree, who dropped a silver acorn, but we need that commanding authoritative voice)

If you find my choices amusing and, or absurd, please take note that I am not a professional casting director and that I never had any experience whatsoever of casting actors for a movie or a play. Please forgive me. However, I love movies, and I believe there is some amount of sense in my choices. I hope my amateur attempt in casting will somehow spark the production of a live action Flight of Dragons movie. It will not only be a great delight to fans of the original animated film but also to a worldwide audience composed of various age groups and race. It is because the theme of The Flight of Dragons will bind them all.

The Need to Elevate The Flight of Dragons to DVD and Into a Live-Action Movie

I've been browsing the Internet for old movies being formatted to DVDs, and I saw this particular kaiju (giant monster) movie Daikyoju Gappa of 1967 having a special DVD in 2008. Believe it or not, this is about a giant mutated lizard/chicken monster that wreaks havoc in Japan. If movies like this cross over to DVD, and a special DVD I may add, why can't a great animated film like The Flight of Dragons make it? This is somewhat unsettling and absolutely puzzling. It is like having Lebron James on the bench when the team, city and league can be benefitting from his contributions in the basketball court.

I have a dream. I plan to find out who owns the rights to The Flight of Dragons, and tell them about the ideas I have written here. I also call on others who share the same admiration for the film and the desire for it to be on DVD and become a live-action movie as well. I invite them to request for these also. I invite them to share their most memorable scenes, express their appreciation for the movie and even give their own casting suggestions. I will collate all of these comments and add them to my own and write and email the one who holds the rights of the film. I will write and email them every month or even every week my requests and any flowing comments from everyone who loves the film until they finally decide to release this on DVD and hopefully, a live-action film as well.

I hope my plan succeeds with a length of a dream and a flash of an inspiration, the only way one can briefly enter the realm of magic as the green wizard Carolinus said. So help me if you can friends, and let us have this fine masterpiece in DVD and a live-action film. Together, let's make an impact with the same force The Flight of Dragons has made in each and every one of us.

The irony is that capitalism is ashamed of its own materialist measures, so its stories always add an extra layer to cover the economic drive. Robin Wood calls this surplus “the Rosebud syndrome” (2004, p. 719), a reference to Orson Welles's famous movie Citizen Kane. After a lifelong pursuit of power and wealth, Kane, on his deathbed, longs for Rosebud, his childhood sled. Disney's Rosebud may be best represented by the kite of the unemployed father at the end of Mary Poppins: it symbolizes the sentiment of family love-one can be poor and happy at the same time.

In a traditional patriarchal American family, the father is the protector and breadwinner, and the mother is the nurturer and caregiver. Consequently, classic Disney male heroes fight for survival and success, while the female protagonist is preoccupied with love and marriage. If she has a job, it is usually babysitting or teaching. This division explains the gender distinction between Dumbo's flight and Cinderella's fantasy. Beneath Cinderella is the domestication of women-girls being socialized by their stories to wait in their tower, like Rapunzel for Prince Charming.

That which is rarely represented or altogether hidden can also be ideological. Whitemale centered, Disney classics rarely feature other races and cultures. If they are represented, they are often stereotyped: the blacks sit by the railway to sing while foreign or aboriginal cultures are locked in their past, romanticized or demonized. For example, the crows in Dumbo are one notable representation of African Americans. Seemingly uneducated and unemployed, they nonetheless are happy (Rosebud syndrome). Similarly, homosexual relations are taboo. Critics like Eleanor Byrne and Martin McQuillan argue that the “brotherhood” of the Merrie Men in The Story of Robin Hood and the “friendship” of the Seven Dwarfs project “homosocial desire” (1999, p. 137), but such interpretation may be overdriven by the political scope of the critics.

Nevertheless, the difficulty in connecting Disney classics to homosexual themes proves that Disney has a schema of compulsory heterosexuality. Even today, when the issue of gay and lesbian relationships has become an open social discourse, Disney's representation of non-heterosexual orientation remains in the dark, with only an occasional portrait of a womanly man (such as Hannah Montana's stylist) or a comic moment of gender transgression (such as the cross-dressing scene in Mulan).

As Disney began to identify with the children's market, his style began to change. By studying Mickey Mouse's change of appearance over time, paleontologist Stephen Jay Gould demonstrated that Disney unconsciously discovered the evolutionary principle of “neoteny” (Gould 1980, p. 104). Because we mammals require parental care for an extended period of time, we developed a natural affection for the baby face (big head, large eyes, bulging craniums, weak chins-in short, the “cute” look) so that we remain attracted to our young.

As Gould pointed out, in over 50 years of gradual transformation, Mickey's appearance has grown backward, from adult to baby (pp. 95-107). Walt Disney might not have known the scientific principle, but his identification with the family market was conscious. Not only does Mickey Mouse gradually grow “younger,” but he also becomes increasingly better behaved. The use of juvenility in Disney's house style is developed out of a prolonged process of experimentation; it is connected to Disney's role as a perpetuator of the American dream in the family setting.

The mature Walt Disney played the role of educator and cultural guardian. This role was not very different from that of the Grimm brothers and Hans Christian Andersen. Disney's storytelling-original as well as adaptive-had the same motivation as that of the collectors and writers of nineteenth-century fairy tales, who believed these stories should be a tool of domestic education. Their view led to the “refinement” of the old wives' tales: removing coarse language, minimizing sexual and excremental references, and so on (Carter 1990, p. xvii); similarly, Disney's classic tales carry this sense of “refinement.”

Disney's classic stories are references for life's many challenges, yet also cast a sweetened reality for the wives and children of the traditional household. At the same time, Disney's masterpieces can indeed underscore a reality that tastes more like dark chocolate than candy. When Disney's classics have happy endings, they do so only in the context of greed (Snow White), social discrimination (Dumbo), the destructive nature of humanity (Bambi), sacrifice (Old Yeller), the cycle of life and death (Perri), and cruelty (Cinderella). As the narrator of Perri explains, “Death is a necessary evil; some die that others may survive.” Or as Bambi's theme song reveals, “[L]ife may be swift and fleeting; hope may die.” Bambi can be regarded as Disney's response to a time of darkness, even though it was conceptualized, based on Felix Salten's book, before World War II. The film preserves Salten's themes of life and nature while spinning a poetic realism to portray human destruction.

In Bambi, nature, represented by a harmonious animal world, is set against a common enemy - namely humanity. As film critic Leonard Maltin described it, “The drama in Bambi is one of understatement, and its effectiveness is great. Dialogue, which is kept to a minimum, is used in a quiet way to contrast the vociferous nature of the film's climaxes. Man is never shown in the film, yet the simple statement by Bambi's mother, after a frenzied chase with dozens of deer running for shelter, that "man [pause] was in the forest" creates an impact no literal device could accomplish” (Maltin 1973, p. 56). Although Bambi survives the forest fire caused by the faceless humans-a happy ending, one may suggest-the film is overshadowed by environmental destruction and anguish. Its ending is cathartic, bringing about a release of negative emotions rather than providing a lighthearted, “happy” resolution.

In this context, the adorable portrait of the animals in Disney's house style is an effective tool for teaching children about the love of nature as well as the nature of love. Love can be defined as a necessary good that motivates one to confront death for the sake of others' lives. It is an engine of survival.

In general, Disney classics demonstrate a balance between entertainment value and artistic quality, revealing life's various challenges and expressing the diverse emotions that a child might feel. They seem to follow certain thematic patterns, some appealing to children generally and others relating specifically to girls. These themes are addressed individually in the discussion that follows.

Alice's Wonderland

The Alice theme involves the exploration of an imaginary world that is full of illogical wonders. From a child's point of view, the world is magical and strange, often overwhelmingly incomprehensible, so this theme is an attempt to identify with children's confusion and to encourage them to go on with life's journey. Obviously, the entire Alice in Wonderland is about meeting strange people in strange places. But the Alice theme also recurs in many Disney classics: the visit to the whale's stomach in Pinocchio, the dream of the pink elephants in Dumbo, the Never-Never Land in Peter Pan, the “Jolly Holiday” episode in Mary Poppins, and so on.

The journey to the strange world always provides a new perspective on life. Most of the time, Disney's adventurer does not return to reality, concluding, as Dorothy does in The Wizard of Oz, that “there is no place like home.” The protagonist in Disney's classics gains new insights about life through the magic of Fantasia. Figuratively, Walt Disney's version of Alice's wonderland is Disneyland itself.

The Pinocchio Symptom

The Pinocchio symptom is also a key element in Alice in Wonderland. Instead of the strangeness of the world, this theme refers to the strangeness of the fast-growing, constantly transforming body of a child. The Pinocchio theme is about coping with growth and socialization. It identifies with children's feelings of being out of control in both body and mind, best represented comically when Pinocchio is partially turned into a jackass.

Usually accompanying the Pinocchio symptom is the realization that things will turn out all right in time-that is, when the potential of the character's humanity is fully realized. Beneath the Pinocchio symptom is the promise of the ugly duckling's transformation into a swan (the motif of the ugly duckling being best known through Hans Christian Andersen's fairy tale of that name).

Bambi's Lament

Perhaps because he identified closely with the tradition of fairy tales in great literature, Walt Disney was not afraid of discussing the loss of loved ones with children through stories. The death of Bambi's mother is certainly the most memorable moment in all of Disney's tales. But the theme also has many variations-for example, the imprisonment of Dumbo's mother, Old Yeller's rabies infection, and the entire cursed kingdom in Sleeping Beauty. Most of the time in children's films, the loss of a loved one is implied rather than portrayed.

The loss of the natural mother in Snow White and also in Cinderella is a good example. This theme is a main ingredient in the fairy tale tradition. Years ago, as Angela Carter explains, “The maternal mortality rates were high and a child might live with two, three or even more stepmothers before she herself embarked on the perilous career of motherhood” (1990, p. xix). Even with the present-day low rates of maternal mortality, the danger of the world and the unpredictability of life remain. Storytelling is a human way of coping with the hardship and complexity of life; the theme of loss and the cycle of life are crucial to children's mental health.

Dumbo's Flight

Dumbo's flight is particularly fascinating. In contrast to European literary themes that Disney inherited through the tradition of children's literature, it is the most “American” in terms of its social and political assumptions. It dramatizes the idea that, if one finds one's own individuality and strength, one can rise above hostile circumstances and become successful. It encourages children to pursue their dreams and live up to their potential. Structurally, Dumbo's flight requires a character who is socially unpopular and/or emotionally confused.

Like Dumbo, not knowing what to do with his life, the character will go through a painful process of self-realization. When the dream is realized, the character will surprise the crowd in triumph. Dumbo's flight does not recur very often in Walt Disney's films because Disney's mantra is more about “never giving up your dream” than about actually “realizing your dream.” Nevertheless, this theme will eventually become central to contemporary Disney girl culture.

The Cinderella Fantasy

Similar to Dumbo's flight, the Cinderella fantasy is about coping with hostile circumstances; however, unlike Dumbo, Cinderella finds love rather than a career. Like Snow White and Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella is passive. She has a good heart but no ambition. Escape, not success, is the incentive.

Unlike the case with Alice, the ordinary little girl who finds selfcontrol in dreamland, Cinderella's journey is incomplete without her Prince Charming. Although this theme has been heavily criticized for presenting a passive model of femininity to girl viewers, in Walt Disney's defense, he did not produce many princess stories in his lifetime, even though the box office receipts suggested that they had universal appeal. Loved by the public, the Cinderella fantasy is a dream of glamour, a fantasy about transcending the meritocracy of modern life through wish fulfillment in the imaginary space.

Taking a nod and a wink from the 70's and 80's vignette style movies The Ten follows a story that surrounds each of the Ten Commandments, all stories are interlinked by the breakdown of a relationship between Jeff (Paul Rudd) and Gretchen (Famke Janssen). While trying to garner a Woody Allenesque feel, the movie actually comes off more like a terrible car crash, where the only civil resolution would be that all those involved were to perish.

I appreciate that my open statement might seem rather harsh; however try making an adult movie with lots of swearing, nudity, sex, and touchy subject matter; then try aiming it at an audience with the intellect of a five year old and you might just begin to understand where I am coming from. The terrible vignette stories include an uptight woman who has sex with Jesus, two men who feud over who has the best and most Cat Scan machines, a drug addict Rhino who tries to warn the community about an incoming bunch of AIDS infected wiener dogs who want to have sex with the locals so they die; and possibly the most bizarre a man who jumps out of a plane without a parachute only to become surgically attached with the earth, while he ponders how to get out of the ground without his internal organs falling out, his girlfriend has sex with the local news anchor before leaving him to have an illicit affair with a ventriloquist doll. And if you think things have got as bad as they can, there is a story about male rape, given a hysterical spin; of course I'm joking when I use the word Hysterical.

The humour is far from funny in this movie, it's in fact possibly the most puerile and worthless humour offering since the likes of Date and Epic movie. Worse still, the trailer makes the movie look half way worth watching, so imagine seeing the trailer, getting all psyched up for what appears to be a worthwhile comedy then having to endure something so terribly abysmal. Things go from bad to worse sadly with this movie, because as well as all the terrible humour (I use the word humour lightly) there is a terrible song and dance number where all the actors sing about themselves (not the characters they play).

"Sometimes I wonder what it might be like if I were the one ass raping you every night! I can't look at you without fantasising about shoving you up against the wall in the laundry room, and punching you in the mouth, and then raping you... Without your consent of course... That's what makes it rape!"

What I do find fascinating about the movie is exactly who stars in it, they have a fairly reasonable calibre of cast including Winona Ryder, Adam Brody (The OC), Ron Silver (Blue Steel), Gretchen Moll (3.10 To Yuma), Justin Theroux (Mulholland Drive), Liev Schreiber (Scream), Jessica Alba, Oliver Platt (Flatliners), and Janeane Garofalo (24, Mystery Men). And if that were not enough there are handfuls of actors from some of the most successful TV shows of recent years. Somehow in my mind the actors and the story just do not add up, this is not a big budget movie, although it is certainly Hollywood. How on earth did so many reasonably sized actors get involved in such a terrible movie? Were they doing someone a favour? Were they repaying a debt perhaps with the devil himself?

What I find most annoying about the movie is the intercut pieces that divide the stories, set on a giant soundstage it's like one of those artsy fartsy theatrical pieces where the actors interact with nothing, trying to make you use your imagination as to what you see. On this giant blacked out soundstage are the two tablets of stone (giant size) containing the Ten Commandments. Both Rudd and Janssen are so so actors either performing well or incredibly badly and this backdrop does neither any favours.

The Ten is due in UK cinemas later in the year, if you're going to take my advice on one thing this year, take my advice on this, because this really is abysmal.

 

Death Race (Sept. 26, 2008)

“An update of the cult classic Death Race 2000, in the not-so-distant future, a prisoner (Jason Statham) is forced to compete in a no-holds-barred car race.”

If Jason Statham is going to be in it than I already know it is going to be BA. I look forward to Jason using his Transporter style acting in another movie.

Land Of The Lost (July 17, 2009)

“Paleontologist Rick Marshall (Will Ferrell) finds himself teleported to another world that is ruled by dinosaurs and reptilian creatures known as Sleestaks. Based on the beloved Saturday morning children's show by Sid and Marty Krofft.”

Yes, Will Ferrell you get lost in that land and do what you do. You could probably make a movie about Will Ferrell being a mute and playing chess and it would still be funny. This was an amazing TV show back in the day, so I look forward to seeing this movie!

The Mummy: Tomb Of The Dragon Emperor (Aug. 8, 2008)

“In 1946, Rick OConnell (Brendan Fraser) and his wife Evelyn (Maria Bello) have just finished a tour of duty as spies for the British army and are looking for an exciting new adventure to go on. Their new assignment - to transport an historical artifact to Shanghai, China - seems easy enough, but trouble brews when they meet up with their son Alex (Luke Ford), who has just discovered the secluded resting place of the Dragon Emperor. When the ancient ruler (Jet Li) is re-awakened, the O'Connell family must stop him from also bringing back his terra cotta army with which he wants to reconquer all of China.”

JET LI!! That is seriously going to be amazing! Why did this movie take so long? Well I bet its going to be the best yet. Anyways have you guys ever been on The Mummy ride in universal? If you haven't you need to, may have been one of the best indoor roller coasters ever!

Punisher: War Zone (Sept. 12, 2008)

“Continuing his war against the world of organized crime, Frank Castle (Ray Stevenson) attacks and viciously disfigures mob boss Billy Russoti, who changes his name to Jigsaw (Dominic West) and raises an even bigger of ruthless gangsters.”

I feel like the first Punisher didn't get as much credit as it should have. The movie was truly incredible; it's a movie I can watch over and over. I am excited to see how they are going to continue the story. Rent the Punisher if you haven't seen it, it's worth it.

Yes Man (Dec. 19, 2008)

”Carl Allen (Jim Carrey) is living a very unhappy life. In order to acquire a more upbeat outlook, he swears to live an entire year by saying "yes" to everything. While his new philosophy has an initially positive effect on his daily existence, being 100% agreeable eventually starts wearing him down.”

Can anyone say Liar Liar 2? Is the pen blue “yes”, is the pen black “yes”. Well which is it black or blue “yes”?

5. Crank 2: High Voltage (2009)

“Chelios faces a Chinese mobster who has stolen his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working.”

Wow, didn't this guy fall out of a airplane and hit cement ground in the first movie. I guess we have another new superhero, lookout here comes Crankman! I didn't love the first movie, it was ok. I really hope this one will be a lot better!

4. The Incredible Hulk (June 13, 2008)

“Still stuck with the ability to turn into a raging behemoth, Bruce Banner (Edward Norton) desperately searches for a cure that will rid him of his gamma-irradiated alter ego once and for all. However, he's barely given a chance to stop running from the obsessed General Thunderbolt Ross (William Hurt) who will use the entire might of the U.S. military to find Banner and kill the Hulk. Meanwhile, Banner also must deal with his tortured relationship with Betty Ross (Liv Tyler), as well as contend with a new opponent, another gamma-created monstrosity called The Abomination (Tim Roth).”

I am going to start off by saying that I got some really good nap time during the first Hulk movie. It would have to be on my top ten worst super hero movies! But sadly I love marvel so I guess I will end up spending $6 to go see this movie anyways.

3. Madagascar: The Crate Escape (Nov. 7, 2008)

“Ben Stiller, Chris Rock, David Schwimmer and Jada Pinkett Smith all return to lend their voices to their animal counterparts: Alex the lion, Marty the zebra, Melman the giraffe and Gloria the hippo. After leaving the island of Madagascar, the creatures find themselves still lost on the African mainland.”

Awesome, I actually really enjoyed the first one! As long as they don't make a “Sharks Tale 2: Sharks Can't Dance” then I am good to go!

2. Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Aug. 15, 2008)

“George Lucas presents an all-new animated continuation of his mythos set in a galaxy far, far away. Taking place between Episodes II and III, Anakin Skywalker and his young female padawan Ahsoka attempt to keep the peace during turbulent times. The young Jedi and his apprentice team up with Obi-Wan Kenobi and Padme Amidala to stop the destruction of the Republic by Lord Palpatine, Count Dooku and General Grievous.”

Yes great idea, lets take all the mini episodes from cartoon network and turn them into a movie! It's like taking candy from a baby.

1. Dragonball (Aug. 15, 2008)

“A young boy named Goku seeks out upon his grandfather's dying request to find the great Master Roshi and gather all seven Dragon Balls (of which he has one) in order to prevent Piccolo from succeeding in his desire to use the Dragon Balls to take over the world.”

I never through it would actually happen, but it actually is. I really don't know how I feel about this, I am excited and nervous at the same time. If they mess this up I am going to be pissed off for quite some time. Also, no super sayians in this movie kiddos, this is Dragonball without the Z! Oh and it looks like you are going to have to compete with cartoon Star Wars, better change your release date soon!